Day14/100 Possibilities

[Carolyn Campbell]

It's very early - 5am. When I let Baxter out for his morning "libations", I saw that it had snowed last night - not alot - but enough to cover the ground, and leave a layer over my vehicle. It smells fresh and clean outside. It made me remember when Baxter was just a baby, maybe 3 or 4 months ... and the first time he saw snow. It still makes me laugh - he was so afraid and would keep running back to my feet, but if I threw a snowball instinct took over and he would chase it and then cock his head at me when he would stop where the snowball landed and exploded, as if to say "where did it go"?. He loves snow now, at nearly 9 years old. I look at his face, with the white of age slowly creeping over the black, and my heart squeezes tight. I love my dog more than any pet I've ever had. He was sent to me I'm sure by angels. He loves everyone, is alwaysalways happy, I was talking to my sister the other day, and as I write this, the tears have started to flow, she mentioned that my mother asked her, "what will Carolyn do when Baxter goes to the big bone/toyland in the sky?". It was such a thoughtful moment, I had never ever thought my mother ever thought about me like that. That she would see that I do have vulnerable moments and that I do cry. I am always the strong one - or so it would appear to them. I don't like to think about when Baxter is not with me anymore, but I know that day will come. I will cry, be sad, thank the angels for the blessings that Baxter has brought me over the years, and most of all, for loving me unconditionally. . My dear friend, has given Baxter a spot next to her beloved Caddy, on Salt Spring, our home, for his final resting place - so appropriate.

Until then, I am going to enjoy the time we have, especially like this morning, where he digs his nose into the snow and tosses it, looks at me as if to say " hey mum this is fun!" and goes back to playing in the white wonderland. As for snowballs, he doesn't fall for that anymore ! haha.

I guess I thought about this, because as I've read several blogs, and have heard from friends here, and when I took out a Christmas ornament that looks like a star that a friend made for me several years ago, who is now dying of brain cancer ... that in times of sorrow, and heartrenching feelings of loss, I can only say - try to remember all the good and lovely words, times, hugs, laughter , and smiles ... that you've shared with that person/pet. I will miss Baxter beyond words and I will be a mess for a while without him. But I know too, that I will always be a better person for having had him in my life.

I am just sending out alot of love, and hugs ... to all of you that are dealing with the loss of a loved one right now.

oxoxoxo

[Robin Amy Bass]

I have thoughts like this, recently ...about my own Five Frantic Felines. What do I do to insure they will alwaysbe taken care of! My Mother understood...It was odd. I'm focusing on the now. Least I'm trying! Any,RYN
Comment by Robin Amy Bass 11 hours ago Delete Comment

Those are actually Dufus and Dufus The Stunt Double.two stuffed dunkies who don't know they are stuffed! I found them when I was working at Macy's herald Square


...Before I had cats, I wrote about stuffed animals -that I named! Children's stories. They have "voices"
So did I...my incarnation...Sheila Walters Rock & Roll Reporter AKA The Big Girl!


- Kinda like a cross between Shari Lewis and The Muppets!
They have their winter scarves on. They do the color version for the Yankees, when it's baseball season. It's the reason george Steinbrenner resigned...LOL

[Carolyn Campbell]

Thanks for those kind words Maggie May :) I probably won't get another dog for awhile as I want to travel for abit .... but yes, I agree. It's my hope that Baxter will pick one out for me :) from the big playground up there! oxoxo

[Maggie May]

This made me get all choked up! I have two dogs and I LOVE them. I've had them all my life and even though they can't understand everything, just a living thing sitting with you is the best thing for your sanity. Don't think about it. It's so hard to lose pets and you will always remember them. However, a new one will steal your heart in the first day. I miss my dogs that we've lost but they are all so unique and loving that you can't help but devote your attention to a new one!