Peace & Love.

whats the point anymore. Happiness is always fleeting, once I find a little peace life continues and pulls me back into reality.

I love the sensations of being alive, and I am generally happy, and I am always thankful.

But nothing is stable. Now I feel so out of control, I feel like I am watching myself live but not really being in control of my actions and this scares me. Numbness I suppose? I feel, but not strongly anymore. I don't know what happened.

I try to relax everyday. I meditate. I… Continue

I got through season one and it helped me pull myself out of the darkest place in my life thus far. That was a year ago give or take a week. Now I cannot commit to a season two as hard as I've tried (I restarted twice already!) But that is the liberation, I no longer need to strickly practice the tools I have learned doing the 100 day challenge because now they come automatically.

Happiness starts as a state of mind, and then it becomes contageous! Surround yourself with positive people, go out… Continue

What is happiness?

I once made a list...
God
Love
Family
Friends
Sex
Cupcakes
Pets
The Carribean
Sailing
Tarot
Baths
Philosophy
Tequila
Summer
and the list goes on for days......

But these things aren't happiness, these are just some things that I enjoy. As abstract as happiness is, I think I understand. It is no longer a list of circumstances that makes me happy (i… Continue

I had to leave my baking lab early today, because I felt very ill. I haven't been sick in a long while, but its not so bad. I guess now I can veg out all day and not feel guilty!! Anyway I am trying to stay positive and hope for a speedy recovery. Being so sick, makes me feel grateful for all the times I am healthy. It also makes me want to be better to my body.

I have been noticing recently that things do not bother me so much anymore. I just lost another job that I just started!!! Its a real… Continue

I am really happy these days.

Things have been going really well for me lately. I have not been fighting or yearning, just relaxing. I just got a new job, thank god I really needed it. I work as a bartender on nights and weekends, which is really fun. School has been challenging but good overall. The class has been making excellent bread (I am baking and pastry major at a culinary school). My life is really exciting, but I do not feel overwelmed!

I am trying to live in the moment, and as I pra… Continue