Unexpected pregnancy. What do you understand about this on a spiritual level? Please offer support

[Elaine]

Hello everyone.

Someone I know (ahem) has recently discovered that she is pregnant by a man who she is not seeing anymore because they were incompatible. He wants her to have an abortion and is being quite an ass about it but she doesn't want to do it.

She 1) just doesn't want to allow a doctor into her uterus to destroy the life in there and 2) believes that for this child to have made it around his vasectomy and her infertile time, then it must have a very strong will to live and who is she to prevent this child who has a great mission in this world. He is so much against the whole thing that she can't even talk to him anymore.

Please share any words of wisdom you might have on this subject.

[Jeannie Bryce]

It is hard to deal with a guy that controlling. This baby is very special and does have a strong spirit, it was meant to be born. I hope for all the love and support to be with this person, Sometimes it is hard to do the right thing but everything will work out. Lots of love, Jeannie

[Elaine]

I am sorry Jeannine Bryce. I know I responded shortly after your comment but it seems to have disappeared. Yes, the guy is controlling and unreasonable but to tell the truth I feel sorry for him. I don't really believe that people can act like that and feel good about themselves. Right now just about everything he does is a reaction coming from a place of fear.

I am not perfect, by any means, but the things that I do are coming from a place of love. So I pray for him, too. And to be honest I will not be surprised when he apologizes to me someday.

Anyway, thanks for the support.

[Nicole]

I am pro-choice, however, women raise babies without men all the time. I say follow the heart(s). it seems as though some pretty difficult obstacles were overcome for this to happen so why terminate? there may not be another chance. I had a baby 8 months ago and although it is challenging, even with a great husband, i often wonder why I waited so long and what was I so afraid of all those years i kept putting it off. Lately, I have found a lot of joy in the fact that my son thinks I am really cool because I can snap my fingers. I know one day he will think I am a dork, but for now, it makes him smile and it is the cutest smile I have ever seen.

[Elaine]

Thanks Nicole,

I am basically pro-choice too and I would have nothing but compassion for a woman who made the choice for an abortion, especially when a person is struggling.

But how adorable your 8 month old must be. I know sometimes it might seem like hard work, but yes very much worth it.
Your son thinks you are the most wonderful thing in the world, actually right now you are the world to him. That is a beautiful gift for you too.

[Bethzazamm]

This child must be a gift just for the mom ( to be ) at this time in her life. I would say to tell your friend to feel honored that God/The Universe is giving her this gift and knows she can handle it without the birth father.

Women having been raising wonderful - gifted children alone since the beginning of time..... because we can :)

[Elaine]

Thank you, Bethzazamm.

It is funny you should say that about being honored to be having this baby and that the universe knows that she can handle it without the father... the more I think about it, the more I realize that on some level the fathers absence is going to be really freeing. I have friends who are now married with babies and their very own husband is their biggest thorn in their side.

Yes, lots of wonderful people were raised by a single parent. This baby will be a wonderful child with a strong spirit! Hee, she (I think it is a girl) might looking forward to NOT having a father figure that limits her freedom. This could be unfolding perfectly right now.

[Cocreative]

Dear Elaine -

I see this child as being possibly the biggest blessing the she (or you) has experienced so far - there is a special reason and purpose for this child who will bring much joy and help her/you grow in ways that might not otherwise be possible. The pregnant one is right to cherish the life of this baby and right in attitude about the unfeeling man, at present. After the baby is born and after some time, this person may mellow and be reconciled.

This child will be a source of so much love in her/your life, as well as unforeseen good

May God's peace and blessings be with you/her.

[Elaine]

Thank you, Cocreative. The child certainly does have a strong mission! It will be so exciting to watch what he or she does and to witness all the wonderful ways this child will benefit those around her and the whole world.

[Evin]

Hi!!!

We are in the same boat, or maybe not because I wanted to be pregnant and become a mother. But I did not espect the the father to be such an ass. He like your guy wanted me to get an abortion.
But my will and this chids will to live is bigger than anything. The father and I dont talk anymore and maybe he will never participate in ower childs live ever. But you know what? Thats ok, even this has a meaning. I just have o trust that things will unfold, I trust this inelligent universe.

I is not easy every time, sometimes I feel so lost, sad and lonley. But luckely the joy and love of what is coming reminds me everytime I am sad.
I am truly blessed to bring life to this earh, and that this child handpicked me as a parent. What a journey that is ahead.

Just trust your inner voice, you already know what to do.
I wich you ALL the love and joy and blessings.
Evin (sorry, my english spelling is not so god)

[Elaine]

Yay, at least there is some good company in this boat! You know, the truth of the matter is that part of me wanted to have another baby but felt a lot of pressure about finding the right guy first. I have been in relationships of some sort since I was a teenager and this will almost be the first full year I have spent single so to be honest I still want to work on me a little bit.

I really just wanted the baby and it looks like that is all I am going to get too.

It is so strange how things unfold for a reason and to be honest I am beginning to realize that I am very fortunate to be doing this alone. Like you, I feel like I have been selected and that the force of our will is powerful. In fact, knowing what a powerful little beings we have inside of us, I understand these poor fathers' attitudes to be those of fools.

In fact about the fathers, I feel sorry for them. They see this world as so scary, burdensome, and difficult that it is better to end their lives. Not to mention the size of those egos with the belief that a life without their involvement would be one not worth living. Ha ha. It is comical really.

Someday they will understand, if they have the opportunity to know these children throughout their lives they will certainly recognize themselves to have behaved terribly in this situation.

We are truly blessed to be living in these times. Yes, this will be a very exciting journey!

And by the way, your English is great.

[Elaine]

I deleted my last comment because I thought it made light of the situation and that didn't seem appropriate on this particular thread.

But I will say that I love you ladies. Blessings to us all! I feel really happy and optimistic. Everything is perfect and will work out perfectly.

[Missy]

Let me tell you a story. My daughter was unexpected. I was 18 and facing being a single mom. Her father wanted me to have an abortion. In my 4th month I almost lost her due to placenta previa. They gave me a 30% chance of living if I hemoraged again and only a 5% chance of making full term with hemoraging. They wanted me to have an abortion for medical reasons. I turned them down too. That doomed baby is now 18 herself she is a writer for our local paper, a mentor to younger kids, and wants to be a psycholgist to help others in thier time of need. She has been there for me and been my rock through some of the toughest times in my life. She has been my number one fan, the one to goad me into trying something I was scared of and helped me become a better person. The father who didn't want her is now back in her life and his deepest regret was not knowing this special girl while she was growing up. I think abortion is a personal choice but yours to make not his.
Blessings
Missy