I need more friends, I'm so lonely and my heart hurts...Please help!

[Augusta]

So, I've been watching parts of this and I started thinking about friends and loneliness...How does friendships work? What makes a good friend? When do you "break up" with a friend? And how? I feel I have so many people I know, but not many I would share the things I do on this site...As a matter of fact, none of them know that I'm even on here...Or even know about this site...I don't feel like telling about it, in a way I feel they wouldn't understand...I'm going to start working on this, I just need to open my heart today and tell about how lonely I feel. It hurts in my stomach and my heart bleeds...Am I always gonna feel this way? I know I have "made my own bed", by being overly independent. Never wanted to receive help or whatever...My mentor says it's understandable from the way I was raised with a psychologically ill mother and a father/step-father with no backbone. I've been seen as the strongest, toughest and funniest girl when I'm about and about. I've been good at sports and in school. I'm a tall blonde and I've got interest for clothes and makeup- so I guess that what people perceive me as- is nothing like what the hell I've been having on my inside.

Even today, I'm very catious on facebook, but yesterday I tagged one of my friends in an old nice picture of us hugging. A few moments later, I saw that she had removed her tag...It felt like a stab for me...Ok, maybee she didn't like the picture, but couldn't she at least have said something about it? I just feel that this is her way of saying that I'm not good enough for her...That there is no room for me in her life...What could I do about this? Ask her? I just would feel so needy and so clingy, and that's not what I want to be....Why am I so vulnerable about such a small thing?

I want friends, real true supporting friends. How do I do that? I need all the help I can get, and would highly appreciate your views on this, and if you could suggest some exercises for me...

So many people are longing for a lover/partner...I jsu want some real friends...

Thank you for listening. Love

[Aleksandra]

Yep, Jason I totally agree with you.....you gve a lot of great advice! Thank you!

Another thing that came to my mind now is that I often ask myself a question, what kind of friend do I want? and then, but am I like this? If you want a friend who is intelligent, smart and interesting, you have to be intelligent, smart and interesting first..........the same with mates! We make endless lists of what our partner should be like: athletic, handsome, sexy, intelligent, rich......but wait? What about us? That is why, I am starting with the woman in the mirror!

What's more, I find this quote useful: 'Be the change you want to see'
' Would you marry yourself?' ( hehe....funny....I laughed for 10 minutes when I first heard it) and Michael Jackson's 'I am gonna start with the man in the mirror'

We attract people of similar energy, when we find out that they have a different energy..........they go away from our lives.....we go in different directions

Hope you find this useful!

Lots of love and good luck!

[Jilly]

Hello, How awesome is all these wonderful responses from all these fantastic peeps across the globe. Thanks you Augusta for sharing and thank you all for the fabulous warm responses. This all I will take with me today. Blessings JILLY

[Jilly]

Oh Boy, Up till now I didnt think I was qualified to respond with an opinion. You see, I see myself as someone that has several friends, good friends that I can depend on, friends that will scream out my name from across the room when I enter, friends that will call me every chance they get just to share what they are doing at that moment or what they did that day. It is a great feeling I will admit.
I have been reading thru all the responses on this blog and realized that I had to comment after reading Jasons comment reading his suggestion to look out the window.
Let me take you back for a moment. There was a time in my first Law of Attraction days when I realized that I didnt like some of my friends. I felt like I had to do some weeding you might say. I noticed the good loyal friends and the not so loyal or neg friends. In the process of weeding I kept the neg friends, but only at a distance. I cut off the social scene with them. At the same time I asked the Universe to fill in the gap. This was the first time I ever ask for friends in my life. I didnt get all mushy about it...I just asked that the cracks in my life be filled with good friends. WELL to my utter surprise the universe delivered tons. Not only local but here on this site. I was so wow'd. I still am. I even put a freinds corner on my vision board during my vision board party. Oh and let me mention this. About those friends that got weeded out of my friendship garden, some are becoming positive. So I am glad that I didnt cut off all ties. We are all linked and I (we) all have to remember that. WE are one. Blessings to you my friend and to all my friends in this Universe and Local, JILLY
P.S. Thanks Jason...I look out the window all the time now and visualize and feel truly blessed.

[Sese O]

I am/was feeling the same way as you Augusta. Reading all these responses has truly lifting my spirit and given me hope. Thank you everyone for posting. Things in my life are already changing for the better and will continue to get even better. Thank you all! Thank you Augusta as well for starting this discussion.